Cox Cable can suck my cock.

I fucking hate Cox Cable. "Cox" is right. This pile of shit sucks cocks. And I mean 300 cocks at the same damn time. Convenient, since there aren't even that many channels on Cox. First off, I've been a customer of Cox Cable for 3 years, and they've treated me like a cock sucker. I'm going to switch to Comcast.

First off, COX, Why can't I watch a damn movie without you buffering every 5 seconds? I literally pay $117 a month for this garbage, and you can't even load the fucking movie? For record, this "Pak" as they call them, costs around $5.00 a month. Why am I paying $5.00 for something that barely fucking works? And why are there so many Paks? Variety Pak, Sports Pak, Movie Pak, etc? Yes, I am a sucker who pays for the Sports Pak, because I like to watch the Football games. For whatever reason this garbage costs $8 a month. $8? Am I not paying enough already? Greedy belch-humpers. 

I also used to have COX internet & email, I got rid of that shit ASAP. First of all, these fuck wand's guaranteed I'd get at least 80% of speed. I paid for a 9 Mb/s, and I didn't even get 3 Mb/s. I called 4 customer service, after waiting 2 hours on hold I'm only told "Oh sorry sir our speeds arent guaranteed". Except you idiots told me they were guaranteed. I had 5 technicians come over to my house and they couldn't fix the problem. I'd also like to mention that the internet liked to die at around 8 - 9 PM every single time, every week, every night, where it would plummet to usually around 28 Kb/s. For the record, this is slower then most dial-up connections in modern-day. Hell, it's slower then most dial-up connections back in the days. (28 Kb/s compared to 56 Kb/s.) After midnight the speed picks up again, but at that point I'm already in fucking bed because I have a job. God damn it. It really pisses me off when I have to wait 4 hours to send an e-mail to my boss. (Usually, I just ended up calling him.) You god damn modem cretins. Also, frequently when using COX, I would usually lose my internet and HD channels, and usually the sports package, conveniently whenever a game is on. For fucks sake.

Oh, and like I stated in the article, remember how I had COX email? Well, they decided to shut down my service and then proceeded to tell me I needed to pay another monthly free to get the fucking email back. You cowabunga fuckers. This isn't how you treat a fine customer of 3 fucking years. That's right, I put up with this bullshit for 3 years, but I finally cut the bullshit and moved onto Comcast Internet and Cable. It's a lot better, it's a bit more expensive but hey, as long as the damn thing works.

Fuck you COX.